Secretive Writer

Random Ramblings .. I write.. I live… I love..



The Incomplete Goodbye..

Sitting at the window of their favorite restaurant.. Sameer looked around.. it seemed like yesterday, when they had visited this place for the first time.. Rhea had loved the decor and they both, Big foodies, had loved the food ūüôā

Rhea : Look at the dim lights, we will use the same for our home, okay ?

Sameer : Yeah.. it’ll be your home.. do it the way you like..

Rhea : Lazy bum, it’ll be our home..

Sameer : Oh yes ! Our home..

and he touched her hair strands falling on her cheeks and put it aside.. She loved it when he did that.. she wished her hair would fall more on her face so he could do it often..

His thoughts were disturbed by the waiter. He looked outside.. a cab had halted and Rhea had stepped out.. She looked simple.. still  attractive.. he kept gazing at her and wished he could feel the way he did for her earlier..

They had¬†a perfect love story till Rhea had to marry some-one else under family pressure.¬†6 months later Rhea realized what an ass her husband is..¬†He was an %$*&^)#@ who believed that women¬†are made for household work. Forcing her into physical relationship without her consent,¬†dominating her over every thing.. She had had enough. She left him against her family’s¬†will.. It was the most difficult time in her life.. The world seemed against her but¬†Sameer was there for her. Always.

After the divorce, Rhea took up a new course and moved to another city. Sameer had to finish his studies too. They both agreed that they needed time off. Rhea had been through a lot and needed her confidence, her life back. She gave all her energy and time to her new course and new job.

Sameer too got busy with his MBA and on weekends he would spend it with old friends and Shruti..

Sameer, Rhea and Shruti were a gang.. Things were perfect till Sameer and Rhea started having feelings for each other.. Shruti came to know about it later, a little too late, cause by then she had feelings for Sameer herself.. But she let it go.. Rhea always thought that Sameer and Shruti are perfect for each other but she loved him. They all had accepted all of this between them and tried to keep the friendship unchanged. With Rhea away,¬†Shruti and Sameer spent a lot of time together.¬†A year later, Sameer felt so distant from¬†Rhea that it didn’t feel like a relationship anymore.. and he didn’t even realize when the friendship between Shruti and him and turned more than just being best friends..

Today, it had been 2 years from the time Sameer and Rhea had met..¬†They had a very honest relationship from the start.. Today, Rhea was herself again and couldn’t wait to meet Sameer.. On the other hand, Sameer had to tell her about Shruti..

Rhea entered and hugged Sameer.. She couldn’t stop her tears..¬†The happiness to see him after so long, it was nothing she could express.. Sameer felt equally happy to see her but what he was going to tell her would change things forever..

A few silent conversations later, Rhea said with a grin: So, you’ve put on¬†weight.. See, I told you,you’d look hotter with a little weight..

Sameer smiled : I was always this hot..

Rhea : Yeah Sure..anyways, how have you been ? and any job placements yet ? How are your Mom and Dad ?

Sameer : Hello, breathe ! KBC !

Rhea smiled : It’s been so long

Sameer wryly smiled : Yes, It’s been too long. *pause* Rhea..

Rhea looked scared.. : This has been first time in years that I am hearing you say my name.. It feels weird..

She didn’t say it but she felt that this one word has increased their distance more than ever before.. he never called her by her name.. never..

She looked in his eye.. she realized there was something he wanted to say and by the look of it.. it felt like she is gonna hate it.. She had knew every heart-beat of his..

He was staring her right in the eye..It wasn’t the way he looked at her..

and then she realized how difficult it is for him to say whatever he was trying to.. and then she took a deep breathe, looked down and asked him in a shivering voice.. Is.. is there someone else ? are you someone else..?

Sameer held her hand.. He had loved her with all her heart and hated to do this ti her.. but he couldn’t love her more.. He couldn’t hide it from her.. Yes.. I didn’t know how.. but it just.. I Know.. but..

He couldn’t find the right words..

There was silence for what felt like hours to them. She have had nightmares of this, but always thought that their love was old-school and forever types.. but then, she knew he did love her truly for the time they were He had been though a lot for her.. He didn’t give up on her when it was the easiest to do.. but then people grow up and people grow apart.. it doesn’t mean that it wasn’t love.. it just means that .. she couldn’t think of what that meant..

She realized he wouldn’t have done this if he had any control over feelings.. she knew that he was the last person on earth who would wanna¬†hurt her deliberately.. He had given her a lot.. She couldn’t take it all away for this.. He was human.. It was bound to happen..

and then she looked at him and asked : Shruti ?

He nodded and she smiled.

They had this innumerable fights which would always end with Rhea saying “We are way too different and¬†Shruti¬†is your soulmate.. go, go marry her..” She always was possessive about him towards Shruti but she also knew that they were best friends and with time she had made peace with it..and now, everything she had imagined was coming true.. It was¬†heart-breaking but funny..

She kept smiling.

She wanted him to be happy.. with or without her.. he deserved it.

She picked her bag and came on the other side of the table to hug a little lost Sameer.. and said “I love you enough to let you go but I can’t say a goodbye.. I hate it but let this be a unfinished-incomplete goodbye.. cause it leaves me with a hope..” she kissed him on his forehead and never looked back !



P.S : Please do lemme know what you guys think of this story ?


One Love..Again

I found this written in an old book.. maybe written almost¬†two years back.. it’s a¬†stupid one and very amateurish.. still for memories sake.. I will post it..


She sat there buttering the already buttered toast, finally placing it on his plate. His hand emerged from behind the newspaper picked up the toast and vanished behind it again, she could hear the ‘crunch’ as he bit into it. He liked his toast just that way put in the toaster with the timer set on ‘two’. For breakfast, he had exactly three toasts one buttered two with marmalade she was making and a mug of coffee made with milk powder mixed just before drinking. The coffee powder-his special brand nothing else sugar exactly one teaspoon. She would keep looking at his car till it turned around the corner, out of sight. Lately she had started taking extra care of his comforts, his breakfasts,his laundry,his towels and bed-sheets. More often than not when he was not home, she found herself curled up on his side of the bed because it had his scent. More often than not she caught a tear escaping her eye on the sly as she watched him leave for office, just like today.

He got into the car, the driver closed the door behind him got in the car and he was on his way to work, he wondered if she still looked at the car from behind till it was out of sight? but did not turn back to look. Every morning they sat at the breakfast table together, she would make breakfast just the way he liked it, the toasts, the coffee. He even suspected her to have been paying careful attention to his laundry, towels and bed sheets. But could not muster the courage to fold the newspaper and look at her, take her hand in his and kiss it like he so wanted to.
More often than not these days he found himself staring at her face as she slept at night, gently touching the bangles she always wore or brushing aside a strand of hair
from her face. More often than not he caught himself stealing glimpses while pretending to be asleep when she came out of the bath. Her hair loosely playing around her neck, her scent filling the room and his senses. More often than not he found himself staring at her pictures in his lap top while going or coming from work just like right now.

They had a love marriage, they started in a one bedroom apartment and had promised to work hard and build themselves their dream home. Back then, they would have breakfast together and she would have to push him out of the house so he doesn’t get late for work. In the evening, he would come home, heap her in his arms kiss her forehead, they would have dinner together talking about the day, make plans for the future. He would kiss her hand and they would sleep in each others arms. Or he would kiss her hand and that would be the beginning of a wonderful sleepless night. Now many of those plans had taken shape, they lived in a wonderful apartment in one of the most expensive ares of the city, the only constant that remained from their past life were the sleepless nights, only they weren’t wonderful anymore. Each lay on his or her side of the bed thinking of the same thing, thinking the other person was asleep, thinking how he missed the other person. Wondering if the other person felt the same. But never knowing, never trying. This had been going on for some time now, their silence had grown into a fragile,insurmountable wall. This went on for some more days.

Then one night something different happened, he came home late as usual, entered the bedroom and found her asleep at his side of the bed, wearing one of his shirts and her shorts, her legs curled together. Normally he would have been upset she spoiled the iron, but he kept his bag on the table, dropped on the floor in front of her. A tear trickled down his eye as he kissed her hand. The familiar long-lost sensation woke her up, she saw him there and all at once, the wall crumbled. Her eyes welled. He hugged¬†her . She was looking at him smiling, not believing he had been there all this while she just had to be on his side. He kissed her forehead,¬†he brushed aside the hair from the nape of her neck,¬†and kissed her…

the night was sleepless, wonderful..all over again !

bas yun hi tumhari yaad aa gayi..
bas yun hi socha ..

ek aarzoo,vo adhuri si nazm puri kar loon..
jo adhi takiyon pe, adhi silavton meh chod di thi
unhi silvaton meh tumhari sanson ki mehek yaad aa gayi..
bhule se baithe the hum…¬†ek dusre ki yaad ko…
ek hi chhat ke neeche.. ghum se gaye the na?
bas yun hi dil ne kaha.. kuch baat toh karoon
toh baton baton mein… tumhari baat yaad aa gayi..

Start a New Life !

R for Rains #AtoZChallenge

R for Rains #AtoZChallenge.

R for Rains #AtoZChallenge

15th May 2014..

As always she needed her sign. “God ! Do I take this ahead. I¬†like him.. more than that actually.. but long-run this is going to be complicated.. so, temme.. Gimme a sign ! Do I take this ahead :)”

She met him. They went to this particular spot .. her favourite place in Mumbai ! She had been there before.. She had in-her-own-way loved before.. But this .. it was not like before.. it was so different.. this love was special.. in a way it was¬†forever.. she knew how difficult this relationship could be.. But she wanted to give this a shot, but wasn’t sure if it was the right thing to do.. for herself and most importantly for him..

She had wanted to hug him.. but didn’t know if¬†she should.. Cause it would change things between them forever..midst of all this thots.. a drop fell from the sky.. and their there was another.. and then it rained.. (Drizzled to be more specific !) .

It felt as if it had just rained for her.. Rains were her favourite thing in the world.. and it rained in May.. It was her sign.. and within a micro-moment.. She hugged him..

He Exclaimed with a mixture of Shock and Excitement.. She couldn’t stop smiling.. “shit ! I made the first move.. what if its not what he wants ūüė¶ “

On the way back.. she looked at the watch that she had gifted him the night before.. “I like the watch, its”¬†

“Yeah! I love it ! ¬†more than that I love the girl who gave it to me”

and that night he told her he¬†loved her.. and she did too.. and it¬†might have not rained a lot that day.. but it definitely rained love.. for them ūüôā

15th May 2019..

She looks at the sea.. It is the same.. like it was five years back.. but everything else had changed. Tjat day she had found the person she thought she was going to spend the rest of her life with.. But life had its own plans.. Circumstances made her maintain unwanted distances with him. She was now living alone in Himachal Pradesh. But on this day every-year, she came to Bombay ! She came to the area where it had all begun, but not the same spot..

She was not sure if he would be there.. what if ¬†he wasn’t ? what if he had moved on.. She had wanted to meet him but was scared that the last hope of being with him would die if he had moved on. She wanted to keep that alive.. she was scared to know the reality.. she had found her bliss in¬†Ignorance.. but still, she¬†knew it couldn’t go on like this forever.. So she prayed every year.. for a sign..

She was reliving those memories again.. when a droplet from the sky fell on her hand.. another one on her cheek.. she looked up with tears in here eyes.. It was Raining.. It was Raining !

With a nervous smile on her face.. and rainwater and tears  flowing from her face.. se walked.. for the first time in five years.. she walked towards the place that was her favourite place in the world..

Thanks to the un-expected rains.. the crowd had vanished.. but with rainy-blurred eyes she saw a man sitting at the same spot.. getting drenched..

She couldn’t see his face..¬†She walked closer..¬†close enough . His back was facing her.. but then she saw and smiled with all tears that had been treasured for all those years..

“That’s a nice watch you have. I like it. It’s nice na ? ” She choked, breaking down with all the happiness that¬†this rain had given her.

He turned. Crying out of what was sheer -pure-happiness.. he muttered

“Yeah! I love it ! more than that I love the girl who gave it to me”

He hugged her before anything else could be said. They had waited too long for this.. The Rains stopped.. but their love had just begun !


O for Optimism & obstacles.. #AtoZChallenge

“It‚Äôs no use having light if you don‚Äôt open the curtains.” ¬†said Saanjh pulling up the curtains. The sunrays beamed and touched Kavya’s room and lit it up.. Kavya looked at Saanjh and though to herself ” It’s so easy for Saanjh to say all this optimistic lines.. she’s always had it all so easy.. she s slim and confident.. she ll get any guy.. unlike the fatty me.. Sameer left me.. what issues does she have in life.. her perfect life..” Disrupted by a pat on the shoulder from Saanjh..”Kavya.. let’s go¬†out.. It’s a beautiful day!” Saanjh wanted to¬†cheer up her l’il friend.. Saanjh took her for lunch to Kavya’s favourite restaurant.. ordered her favourite food.. and still not a single smile appeared on Kavya’s face.. “Kavya, i know it’s difficult.. but you can’t let all this¬†take¬†away your life.. I am not saying its ok.. i am saying.. It will be” “Saanjh.. It’s easier said then done.. you say you understand,¬†you don’t .. you don’t know what is it to be dumped by the boy who you loved.. to be all be heartbroken” Saanjh¬†grinned ” Actually I do.. When I was your age.. You ended a two-month relationship.. I was through an end of a two-year old relationship without even a goodbye.. I saw him moving on to another girl without even ending it with me.. I made friends with his girl and lived my pain for days..¬†but you know what.. five years later.. IT got over.. cause¬†I believed it will.. Cause I have believed that it is the darkest before the dawn.. Cause¬†everything becomes okay by the end..” “And now I have a messed up life.. I love someone¬†and my parents are set to get¬†me married to someone I¬†hate…” “What.. How .. why ?” Kavya was stunned.. “Dont worry! ¬†i still think it will be okay.. I will be happy.. sooner or later! So you see my life isn’t perfect.. but then I know¬†it will get will be okay” A light was dawning in Kavya’s¬†head. Life had handed Saanjh¬†some pretty pathetic¬†cards too, but her secret was in how she dealt with them. Her¬†curtains were always open. Kavya¬†hugged Saanjh and wiped the tears. Saanjh smiled through the tears, like she had always done..and Kavya promised herself to keep the Curtains open..No matter what the weather she was determined not to miss out on those sunny days. #Optimism

A to Z Challenge.. K – Kevin Doyle (27 Dresses)#AtoZChallenge

We all have been in love with some or the other move character at a point of time. My love – Kevin Doyle from the Rom-Com ’27 Dresses’. He is my kindda guy..HE IS MY Guy!

Blunt.. Witty.. Brooding Eyes.. Self-made.. Caring(he gives her a blackberry so she doesn’t have to carry her FiloFax’..Awe)… ¬†Writer..(Brownie Points )Human.. Romantic.. the way he looks at her..

“Do you wanna know the real reason why I came here tonight? Because I knew this was going to be hard for you. And for the first time in a really long time I wanted to be there for somebody‚Ķ. But I want you to know that I think you deserve‚ĶI think you deserve more than what you‚Äôve settled for. I do. I think you deserve to be taken care of for a change. I believe that.”

Uh! he is everything that a perfect guy should be.. actually he is more ūüôā

C’mon people.. tell me your favorite Movie Character ūüôā


P.S A to Z challenge 

Start a New Life !

Ananya was¬†born in a traditional Brahmin family where, girls couldn’t sit next to their elders and faces were still covered with Ghungat(Veil)..However, Ananya was the black sheep of the family..She chose a career which no-one approved of. She was a true work-a-holic and worked for nights which again, created issues in her family as “ladkiyan der raat tak kaam nahi karti’. She had believed that you live life only once and she wanted to live it completely.. but she knew¬†she didn’t wanna hurt anyone.. So, the live-life-at-my-own-terms Ananya was often pushed away giving place to the bhartiya-nari Ananya.. It was a ok-ok kindda life, until, she fell in Love with¬†Krish. He was the friend who had seen her cry over heartbreaks and loved¬†her then. He had seen her at her worst and loved her then. HE had simply loved her at all phases of life. IT took her a lot of time and arguments with herself to finally accept her Love for him.. bcoz¬†she knew it wasn’t gonna be easy with him.. they had a 4 year age gap with her being on the elder side, cast differences, their parents were, almost, full of hatred for each other.. ughh ! but everytime he saw her.. it felt like the world stop¬†and they knew it was worth it.. Then the unfortunate happened, she was married to a guy¬†of her parent’s choice.¬†She hated the guy but her dad’s ill health and family pressure made her succumb to the marriage. It took her just a week to realize it was her biggest mistake of her life. She¬†confronted to her parents of her un-happiness only to realize that they don’t/won’t¬†understand..For her parent’s happiness..she gave it another shot..6 months of a dead relationship..She knew it was a mistake but she thought she owed her parents that much.. 6 months later:¬†Packed Bag. Teary Eyes. Anger. Alone.It’s over. This is not gonna work, ever. Whatever the reason might be.. none of the two people involved deserve a relationship which is empty. Maybe things might just get worse from here.¬†Being Divorced is not easy and definitely not for¬†the fairer sex but being in a house and regretting it every moment is worse than that. No matter how difficult, turning the page may seem like.. It’s time to start over..It’s time to start a new Life ūüôā Current Day: Setting up our new home.. White & Blue Curtains ? What¬†Say? and white walls ? Krish just doesn’t help :/ lazy bones ! Ok, Krish is ordering some pizza, while I am thanking God for him and our Home. We looked this place at¬†!! It’s perfect for our New Life ! It’s actually more than perfect ūüôā


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